a blog about recovery from all addictions, disorders and general self-hatred.

*posts will not be triggering.*

unless otherwise stated








...disclaimer In no way am I a professional counselor or therapist. I am a recovering addict. The advice I give is from my own experience and in no way do I claim to cure, treat, or diagnose any mental illness or addiction. I suggest to anyone beginning recovery get professional help.

Eight Ways to Drive Yourself Nuts

›› The key to “unlearning” negative thinking patterns is based on questioning the assumptions that underlie them.

Once we start “seeing” through the lens of one or more of these thinking patterns, we’re many times more likely to distort reality, make poor decisions, and wallow in negative feelings—exactly what we don’t need to promote a stable recovery.

Most of these negative thinking habits are based on assumptions. They aren’t exclusive to people coping with addiction, by the way. They’re common to many forms of mental illness, and they can afflict most of us at one time or another during our lives, even if we don’t suffer from any disease at all.

The key to “unlearning” negative thinking patterns is based on questioning the assumptions that underlie them. Here are eight questions that you can learn and use to help yourself “unthink” the habits that are driving you nuts:

  1. Am I confusing a thought or a feeling with a fact?
  2. Am I ‘reading minds’, presuming to know what other people think or feel?
  3. Am I putting things in terms of ‘all or nothing’?
  4. How would this situation look to someone other than me? Have I taken the time to ask other people what they think of my problems?
  5. Am I getting closer to a solution or just rehashing old stuff?
  6. Am I wasting time on questions that have no answers?
  7. Am I acting as if something is inevitable when it may not happen at all?
  8. Am I overlooking strengths and focusing exclusively on weaknesses?
Based on the principles of Rational Emotive Therapy™

(Source: believeinrecovery)

» time 1 month ago  » notes 58

THE TINY RISK-TAKING CHALLENGE

article from tinybuddha.com

“A diamond is just a piece of charcoal that handled stress exceptionally well.” – Unknown

Two years ago, I was sitting in my car thinking just after being laid off from the job I thought I’d probably spend the rest of my life doing. According to how these stories usually go, I should have been mad; I should have been scared; I should have wanted revenge.

But I didn’t feel any of these things. Instead, I felt an unexplainable happiness—like a weight had been lifted from my shoulders. When the shock of the moment wore off, I realized why I was so happy; all of a sudden, anything was possible!

It had been years since I’d tried something new. It’d been years since I’d taken a risk on myself. It’d been years since I’d actually felt alive. And this moment had snapped me out of it.

So, sitting there in my car that day, faced with no idea what my life was going to look like starting tomorrow, I asked myself a simple question:

What would my life be like if I did something that scared me every single day?

Read More

(Source: believeinrecovery)

» time 2 months ago  » notes 3

So you want an eating disorder?

believeinrecovery:

I’ve had this saved in a word document for awhile, if anyone could tell me the source, it would be much appreciated. 

*ed trigger warning, this article is powerful.*

So… you think starving is a good way to lose weight, do you? I think you’ve read too many fairy tales. Well, this isn’t one. Neither are eating disorders. They are sheer and total HELL. But, since you want one, I’ll go ahead and prep you for it. I’ll let you know exactly what will happen to you. If this doesn’t make you realize how completely stupid running out there and trying to develop anorexia is, then I wish you the best of luck in killing yourself. Because that’s all you’ll be doing.

Read More

this has been getting lots notes lately. i’m so glad! ED is scary.
i hope it made an impact on at least just one person.

» time 2 months ago  » notes 293

9 Mindfulness Rituals to Make Your Day Better

article from zenhabits.net

“Smile, breathe and go slowly.” - Thich Nhat Hanh, Zen Buddhist monk

Are you simply moving through your day, without fully living?

I did this for many years. It was as if life were just passing by, and I was waiting for something to happen. I always felt like I was preparing for something later.

But today isn’t preparation for tomorrow. Today’s the main event.

Fully live today by being mindful. I realize this is easier said than done — mindfulness is a habit that’s not easily picked up. And so I’ve decided to share with you some of my favorite mindfulness rituals to help you appreciate every moment.

You don’t need to do all of these, but give a few of them a try to see if they make your day better.

Read More

(Source: believeinrecovery)

» time 3 months ago  » notes 26

How To Be Happy: 10 Timeless Principles for Lasting Happiness

this is an awesome ‘happiness guilde’- all the links open up to their site.
article from personalexcellence.co

Are you happy? How happy would you say you are, on a scale of 1-10?

Our society today is entrenched in low levels of consciousness of fear, desire and pride. Despite the increasing affluence of people in our world, it seems people are more and more unhappy today. From unhappiness with work, unhappiness with their life, unhappiness with the world,unhappiness with themselves. If you think that the people around you seem quite unhappy, let me tell you that this is a common issue everywhere in the world – be it countries/cities I’ve been to in Asia, in Europe, or in America.

In light of this epidemic, I’ve created a guide on how to be happy. The mark of a good life is one that is filled with happiness. If you’re not happy at all, then what’s the point of doing any of this to begin with?

I see this as a timeless guide, with 10 of my universal, timeless principles to achieve happiness. May you find these 10 principles useful in your quest for happiness. Know that at the end of the day, happiness comes from within, not from outside. This is why the guide focuses on intrinsic, permanent steps to achieve happiness, rather than extrinsic, surface-level tips which only have a temporal effect (such as listening to music, going shopping, etc).

Read More

(Source: believeinrecovery)

» time 3 months ago  » notes 12

LIFE IS THE RESULT OF YOUR BELIEFS AND EXPECTATIONS

article from tinybuddha.com

“The outer conditions of a person’s life will always be found to reflect their inner beliefs.” ~James Allen

Just because you’ve believed something is true, even if you’ve believed it for a long period of time, that doesn’t mean that it is actually true or that it has to be true for the future.

For a long time I believed that my body was broken. I believed that I could never be super lean and ripped even though I really wanted to be. I also believed I had irreversible digestive issues that seemed to be getting worse and worse.

I spent a lot of time searching for answers because I believed that somebody out there somewhere had to have the cure to fix me.

Read More

(Source: believeinrecovery)

» time 3 months ago  » notes 12

The Habits That Crush Us

article by Leo Babauta

‘Don’t panic.’ -Douglas Adams

Why is it that we cannot break the bad habits that stand in our way, crushing our desires to live a healthy life, be fit, simplify, be happier?

How is it that our best intentions are nearly always beaten? We want to be focused and productive, exercise and eat healthy foods, stop smoking and learn to get rid of debt and clutter, but we just can’t.

The answer lies in something extremely simple, but something most people aren’t aware of:

We don’t know how to cope with stress and boredom in a healthy way.

Read More

(Source: believeinrecovery)

» time 4 months ago  » notes 20

12 Common Causes and Proven Cures for Unhappiness

article from marcandangel.com

For the average person happiness is a choice, yet numerous people are unhappy.  There are many reasons, but it all boils down to one simple principle:  They choose something else over happiness.  Because it often takes less effort to be unhappy.

For example, instead of seeking happiness, they…

  • Lazily follow the path of least resistance.
  • Refuse to accept change.
  • Aimlessly try to control the uncontrollable.
  • Etc. etc. etc.

Averting these poor choices and the negative attitudes that accompany them is the key.  The list below will give you some ideas on how to do just that.

Read More

(Source: believeinrecovery)

» time 4 months ago  » notes 27

5 WAYS TO FIND YOUR BALANCE

essay by Janeen Paul 

The yoga class I attended yesterday included a number of balances, from simple tree pose to a “floating” ardha chandrasana. I am not certain why, but I was struggling to find a steady balance on one side.

I arrived late feeling flustered, and my mind was spinning and worrying as we worked our way into the flow. I had to struggle to make my gaze steady, and I was starting to beat myself up for the wobbling on my left leg.

Then I had a realization: This is really the whole point of balancing poses, if not yoga itself. The point is simply to be with yourself, no matter where you are at that moment. Or, as Thich Nhat Hanh said: “Smile, breathe, and go slowly.”

Later, I thought a lot about balance, and how we are always trying to find it in our lives.  I talk with patients about it almost every day, and no one seems to feel they have it under control. 

Read More

(Source: believeinrecovery)

» time 4 months ago  » notes 9

27 Healthy Habits of Happiness

article from marcandangel.com

How do we heighten our happiness?  There are many ways and one size does not fit all.  Below I discuss what has worked for me and those closest to me – how a small group of us went from downbeat and drained to a happy and hopeful in a few short years.

  1. Look for happiness in the right places. – When we’re young we look for happiness in drugs, sex, alcohol, parties, fast cars, extreme sports, etc.  Then when we get a little older, we look for happiness in more ‘mature’ ways – a stable partner, romantic getaways, walks along the beach, jazz music, a night at the bar with some friends.  Do they work?  Do these things make us happy?  Sure they do.  They raise our happiness temporarily.  But people have a baseline of inner happiness.  Certain events and possessions, like an unexpected windfall, might raise or lower our happiness momentarily, but soon we return to our inner baseline.  The key is to gradually raise this baseline.  Enjoy the moment, but don’t completely ignore long-term goals.  What will you be proud to have accomplished, or disappointed that you didn’t do, five years from now?

Read More

(Source: believeinrecovery)

» time 4 months ago  » notes 45

HOW TO SET HEALTHY BOUNDARIES: 3 CRUCIAL FIRST STEPS

article from tinybuddha.com

“You change for two reasons: Either you learn enough that you want to, or you’ve been hurt enough that you have to.” ~Unknown

I learned about boundary work when I was teaching in the NYC jails with male prisoners.

After driving onto a maximum security island of electric, clanging gates, I encountered metal detectors, hallways filled with yelling, chaotic inmates, and tension and anxiety in the air that was almost tangible.

I started my work day tensed up and ended it drained, exhausted, and overwhelmed.

In other areas of my life, the same thing was happening. In my personal relationships, I couldn’t find the edges where I ended and others began. I sometimes felt powerless, unsure of who I was in relationships, and unheard. I wasn’t sure how to change my life, but I knew that I had to.

Read More

(Source: believeinrecovery)

» time 4 months ago  » notes 10

Ten Ways to Make 2012 Your Best Year Yet!

article from growingbolder.com - all links in post send you to site.

Happiness, health and prosperity to you in 2012! Don’t you say that every year? I’m sure you mean it. I’m sure you’re very sincere. But instead of just “wishing” it, would you be willing to help someone, or even help yourself increase the odds of achieving it?

It’s really very simple. All you have to do is stop being a passenger. Stop watching the days and years of your life roll by as if you’re staring at it through a window. Make this the year you take control. Start truly living life. Live each and every day with vigor, with wonder and with purpose.

Read More

(Source: believeinrecovery)

» time 5 months ago  » notes 9

So you want an eating disorder?

I’ve had this saved in a word document for awhile, if anyone could tell me the source, it would be much appreciated. 

*ed trigger warning, this article is powerful.*

So… you think starving is a good way to lose weight, do you? I think you’ve read too many fairy tales. Well, this isn’t one. Neither are eating disorders. They are sheer and total HELL. But, since you want one, I’ll go ahead and prep you for it. I’ll let you know exactly what will happen to you. If this doesn’t make you realize how completely stupid running out there and trying to develop anorexia is, then I wish you the best of luck in killing yourself. Because that’s all you’ll be doing.

Read More

(Source: believeinrecovery)

» time 5 months ago  » notes 293

Fostering a Positive Body Image

Have you ever taken a good look at the cover of women’s fitness magazines? The models are thin but they aren’t “fit”. They seem to be the direct opposite of what the magazine is about - fitness. Shouldn’t the cover of a woman’s fitness magazine show a real woman with muscle tone and not just another “perfect” body? Unfortunately, we’ll probably never see a typical American woman on the cover of any woman’s magazine. Our society is very “outer oriented” and it is the media’s job to sell the myth of perfection.

According to the American Psychological Association, 30-40% of Americans are somewhat unhappy with their appearance while another 45% may experience anxiety or depression due to dissatisfaction with their appearance. In other words, we are buying into the myth.

Read More

(Source: believeinrecovery)

» time 6 months ago  » notes 2
» time 6 months ago  » notes 189